Sports, Concussions and My Son

Sports, Concussions and My Son

On a rainy day in August my whole family – meaning my three kids, my husband, and I – were stuck inside watching ESPN. Whenever a TV is on in any room with my husband, we all always end up watching ESPN. A special program about concussions captured our collective attention. I was shocked by the facts being presented about brain injuries associated with having concussions, and even more dismayed when I learned about diseases and conditions that are now being linked to having had a concussion.

In particular, links to Lou Gehrig’s disease (ALS), to sudden and inexplicable heart attacks, to strokes, and to Parkinson’s disease caught my attention, because MY SON PLAYS FOOTBALL. And everyone acknowledges that concussions occur frequently among football players. Although my son is very fast, he is also tall and thin. His body reminds me of a baseball player’s or a tennis player’s, but not a football player’s. Yet he plays football.

After the show was over, we talked about why my son wanted to play football given the potential long-term risks to his health. He was completely irrational, only talking about how his speed and agility would keep him out of harm’s way. He never really considered what might happen if he were hit really hard and suffered a concussion that might damage his brain for life.

I realized once again that teen brains just can’t process the consequences of their actions. They do not understand what ‘irreparable long-term damage’ means. My husband said, “Let the boy be a boy”. The conversation was over, and when school started, my son was playing on not only the junior varsity but also the varsity football teams. I had lost the battle.

The football season was off to a great start. My son was highlighted on the cover of the school’s sport publication. I was more concerned about his grades and classes. He was taking six courses, four of which were at the honors or advanced placement level. He is a smart boy. But I felt that his grades were not as good as they had been the year before. The teachers all responded during parent-teacher conferences in October that he should drop a class so that he could continue with football. I was genuinely surprised that no one recommended dropping football so that he could continue with his six classes. My expectations for my son have never included sports. He is too smart to just play a game.

Early in November, I received a phone call that no mother wants to get. It was the school physician telling me that my son was injured in a football game. He was going to be fine but he had a “CONCUSSION”. He had been hit, but no one had seen exactly what had happened. When he walked off the field, however, he did not know where he was or the names of his teammates. I repeated the words slowly to make sure that I had heard them correctly. I was in a trance. I could only register the words, “He is going to be fine”.

Two months later, he is still not ‘fine’. He is suffering from short-term memory loss and processing problems. He missed a month of school. He is only taking four classes and is still sleeping too much. If you ask him a simple question like what he wants to eat, he can’t answer the question with ease.

He has seen several doctors who all tell me that he is going to be fine, but he is not fine yet. We are still waiting…

Diary of a Yale Mom